I wanted to read “Ready Player One” by Ernest Cline before watching the Steven Spielberg movie adaption.

After a nearly 2 month long wait on a waiting list, the digital audiobook copy was finally available at my local library and I started listening right away.

I was immediately engaged in the book, it was incredibly overly descriptive and immersed with pop culture.  The novel has a unique style and cadence that actually worked really well in audiobook form. Since looking at other reviews of the novel, a lot of the things that bothered other readers – clumsy, wordy passages and time spent deep in the weeds describing, in excruciating detail video game play didn’t stick out to me as a listener. Credit is due to Wil Wheaton, who narrated the book with a smooth buttery delivery that was not overacted and really sold the characters and the story.

I don’t like to be deeply critical of a story, I much prefer just to take in as it is. If it is painting a mental picture and has me guessing what is next- I can ignore some of the more problematic plot devices and holes. I was not as bothered by Wade Watts as some other readers seemed to be.

The story kept me guessing, and invested and I was glad for a happy ending. There was some problematic use of the love story at the end, (Artemis being reduced to not much more than a prize) but I was willing to look past it.

My mistake was watching the movie too soon after listening to the book.

As soon as the credits started rolling on the audiobook, I rented the film adaption from ITunes.

I think the story was still too fresh in my mind to be able to enjoy the movie for what it was- a brilliant spectacle with a very different story to tell.

I knew the movie was different than the book, but I was not prepared for exactly how different. About 45 minutes in, I declared that it is misleading for the two to even share a title.

After finishing the movie, the page of notes I took makes me laugh. I scribbled out the first one as soon as the first title card appeared on the screen. My note reads “The stacks are in Columbus Ohio instead of Kansas City now.” So young, so naive, I thought this really counted as a creative liberty the film took. Compare to the rest of the movie, this is a drop in the bucket.

I did not like the movie. I passionately hated it. I hated it for the changes it made, and the liberties taken. I had just excitedly finished a story I was invested in, I wanted to see it play out on screen. What I got was a shell of that story.

I think the movie was probably good in it’s own right. If you never read the book, I think it’s a lot easier to like. I think that if I had even a little bit more distance between the book and the movie, I would have liked it more.

However, I had major trouble with the casting of Nolan Sorrento. He was played like a generic villain but also didn’t ever come across as all that terrifying. A mustache twirling goon that didn’t ever really feel like he had any power.

Which brings me to my next point, the stakes never felt high enough. The novel describes a dilapidated world, where everyone is just trying to survive. The power that the prize money holds is inconceivable- enough to change the world and the world is a scary place. When Sorrento threatens Wade, first by simply knowing his name and then with violence- it is legitimately terrifying. That does not translate at all in the film version. It’s cartoonish and cheesy. And Wade doesn’t even seem to really care all that much about winning.

Wade on screen is a disappointing version of himself. When Art3mis tells him he deserves to win (what?! #notmyart3mis she would never say that) I don’t believe her. What gave her that impression? This Wade is reckless… openly saying his first name in the Oasis (what?) and never grasping the severity of the situation.

The pacing felt so off, everything happened so quickly and with so little background. I know the movie doesn’t have the same options as the novel for long, drawn out exposition and it wouldn’t be visually appealing to show Wade and Art3mis getting to know each other- but what we get is rushed and hokey. I officially checked out during the dance scene at the club- did she really go under his legs, ugh. I couldn’t get past how cheesy and contrived it was. And then, in the same scene, only the 3rd scene we have seen the two together in- he says he loves her. And she says he’s not committed to finding the egg. And it’s also so rushed and out of nowhere, I have whiplash.

I know that the movie couldn’t take place entirely in the Oasis. Well, I mean, it could have but for some reason it doesn’t. It makes sense, from a film perspective to take the characters into the real world and have them meet so much sooner. But man, I hated it. By the middle of the movie, it is a completely different story. Perhaps a good one, but I couldn’t see past it. Towards the end my notes are just rants, including “Ugh. this is so sad. it’s a shell of the story, everything is rushed and weak”.

Visually, it was beautiful. I love seeing the stacks come to life. I thought the casting of H was perfect, Lena Waithe knocked it out of the park with the little she had to do. I enjoyed the sights and sounds of the Oasis and the fight scenes were spectacular. I did not like the way James Halliday was portrayed and I feel the need to say again- the handling of Sorrento was my biggest complaint. The addition of an expanded E-Rock into the story was  brutal.

Finally, the scenes that showed all of the people- out on the streets, wearing their visors. No.

It was a true struggle for me to finish the movie.  Player One was not ready.